It was a difficult day Tuesday at my Grandma's service. I'm really going to miss her. And its a signal of more change. All my happy farm visits as a child, the dependable qualities of my grandma, and even Thanksgiving with the Lenssen side of the family are now just locked away in my memory vault. I know that my parents don't see their cousins regularly, so I can assume the same for myself in the future, but I am not happy about it. Not to mention that the majority of my cousins are having their own families now, and I am way behind in that department.
Besides deep sadness, the most common emotion I had being there with my family, burying my Grandma, was thankfulness. I looked around and saw people that love each other, like each other, and have chosen to stay with each other. My Grandma loved God, and its obvious that her kids picked up on that and found it to be true for themselves. The Lenssen family has no big feuds, we enjoy each other's company, and we are just there. Always there, together. I know a lot of families are a big mess, and I am glad to be surrounded by good, forgiving, selfless people that I know would do anything for me. I'll have to tell you about the other side of my family another day. They are just as good.
The urge to cry at any moment is starting to wear off. I can remember my Grandma's funny moments and laugh about her straightforward personality. She sent me back a letter, just a week before she died. She always responded to every letter. She said, "This old age is for the birds..." Who says things like that? If you knew her voice, you would know how funny that was. She was very lovable. I feel glad for her that she doesn't have to live in that musty, boring, old folks home anymore. That she is with my Grandpa now, and Jesus. Right where she probably wants to be.
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